The company I keep

Yesterday I had the unvarnished and unwarranted pleasure of having lunch with 15 women; I being the only male so invited. These women are the spine, the heart, the very womb of the Rodney District Council. They are the personal assistants (PA’s) who in that capacity know everything and know nothing, which makes them extremely formidable and somewhat daunting as companions at a lunch table. But they are also extremely good company. How we laughed; sharing our feminine sides—mine taking a little more effort to extract than theirs. I have always known that woman were preferable company, that’s why I married one, but I never quite realised that, en mass, that company would exponentially magnified in direct proportional ratio. I am drawn to the conclusion that it is a great shame men ruled the world for so long; they are so boring, so intense, so stilted. Whereas women are flirtatious, responsive and adaptable. The only cases when they have not been so in the political arena is when they acted like men, or maybe thought they were men. But even here, I suggest, they would be more successful than the converse: a man trying to lead as a woman. Unless a man is entirely camp, and even then he becomes less a woman than a parody, it is entirely impossible for a man to act like a woman. He cannot even begin to understand them, let alone replicate them. Even if he has a small measure of success as I think I had yesterday he cannot sustain it; it is far too tiring and leads to one being stripped naked—metaphorically speaking, I hasten to add. No, I thoroughly enjoyed the company I kept yesterday, but it was good also to return to the company of men and in particular a couple of crusty old reporters who like nothing better than to have a beer and talk about women.

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