Alarm bra

Yesterday for the first time I activated the alarm system we inherited with our new home. It was less than five hours before it sent its first false-alarm to the monitoring service and ejaculated a screaming orgasm of a siren that I am told many of our neighbours thought heralded either a tsunami alert or the imminent arrival of a tardy Japanese invasion force.
It also drew forth the local constabulary who took the time and trouble to ring me at work to say my alarm was going. As I am unaware that I am “known to police” as police parlance puts it, this was an agreeable surprise.
But I was left to question why I am known. I would not have thought that even in a community as small as the one I now live in I was of such standing in that community. Both my speeding tickets have been paid, so it cannot be that. The sign out front proclaims and promotes the builder of the house, rather than a tinnie house. The light to the side of the house is blue rather than red testifying to the virtue rather than the vice of my lovely wife. Yes, I know I have not yet made my promised Westpac Rescue Helicopter donation, but it is a little early to call the police in on that. Yet I am known to police. Am I perhaps erroneously on one of those secret lists of “people of interest” they circulate through their stations? You know the ones: known car thief, hangs out (literally) at public toilets, steals bras, criticises Council. I am none of these of course. But now I am paranoid—what do the police have on me?
Or am I just being alarmist?


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Now playing: Led Zeppelin - Ocean
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On the Left Bank

Now if I was a Westpac employee and mistakenly transferred $10,000,000 instead of $10,000 into a customer’s account I would be seriously worried about retaining my job. Fryday feels sorry for that person. Mistakes happen, and this appears to a slip of the fingers that could happen to any of us. So I hope Westpac reacts compassionately and realistically in regard to their employee. Of the couple who absconded with the money I am more ambivalent. It was certainly fortuitous for them, given their parlous financial state, and you have to say they were opportunist. But my question is how did they do it? Any time I have gone to my bank (and I have a very friendly bank) to withdraw any sum exceeding $1000 I go through a series of checks. Now, if I also had a bad credit history, as this couple apparently has, and all of a sudden I was withdrawing millions of dollars in a single transaction, which they must have done given the time-frame, would not this have rung some warning bells? We’re told by a banking expert in the NZ Herald today that standard international procedure for large transactions ($250,000 or more) meant that even if the money had been transferred in stages, it would have been subject to a "value dating process", which would mean a delay of up to two days before funds became available. Seems that didn’t happen here. So this couple seems to be fortunate on a couple of accounts with their back account. Of course, they are now on the run and they may not win out in the end. Then again, they just might. It’ll be interesting to keep track of this story.


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Now playing: Ry Cooder - River Come Down (PKA Bamboo)
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