Showing posts with label Cows. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cows. Show all posts

Friday, May 11, 2018

Sex, with cows


When Fryday has nothing to write about and doesn’t want to revisit Wogistan, it usually reverts to the Hamilton Library’s Book of lists or The University of Waikato.
This week Fryday went to university
The University of Waikato is fertile ground for Fryday. It is the go-to place for ill-considered and retrograde activism and totally useless research. You may recall a Fryday post about the award-winning Waikato University study into “the geographicalism of sexism”. The university has disclosed a more recent and equally compelling thesis on Hamiltonians’ addiction to cars. The best that can be said for that is that cars may be the only addictive thing about Hamilton.
For an update Fryday visited the university website today and using the search box found:
56,817 posts on sexism
333,480 posts on racism
 370,853 posts on sexuality (they like it down there)
 313,143 posts on cows
And remarkably (don’t ask):
  3,482 posts on cows and sexuality.
The University of Waikato is certainly the place to be if you want to produce relevant, compelling research that provides optimal use of the public purse.
Of course The University of Waikato is not alone among universities in its weirdness, or indeed in its love of cows. In researching the latter, Fryday was drawn to the Sub-Continent where cows are just as loved, revered and worshiped as they are in Hamilton.
It was no surprise therefore to find the University of Kota.
Kota takes the cake for weirdness.
Just visiting the home page of its website is to delve into www or, as I describe it, the wonderful world of weird. Be patient with the opening welcoming video—it starts slow, but I can promise you it gets even slower. It celebrates something called the Fifth Convocation. A dictionary definition of convocation is a large gathering of people; up to now I thought it was prisoners going on holiday.
Going deeper into www:Kota one finds a page devoted to anti-ragging rules. What is ragging? Again a dictionary definition: it “now” means an act that violates a student’s dignity. It used to be a woman having her period. I am not sure when the page was posted on the Kota website, but—I suggest—the timing is important, because the intent is to “curb the menace” of ragging and that could, periodically, be very weird indeed.
However, in defence of the University of Kota and all other universities  a search of their sites reveals no posts for cows and sexuality.
Waikato, it appears you have that on your own.

Friday, September 11, 2009

The 2009 Hamilton List

Regular readers are aware that Fryday publishes the annual Hamilton Books List. This is a list of books currently in Hamilton public libraries, which, for the reasons specified, have drawn some distinction. Fryday is indebted to the Hamilton Public Libraries service for the 2009 list.

• Most Stolen Book: Oily Rag—Living for next to nothing in Hamilton.
• Most Despised Book: Next to Nothing—An Aucklander’s view of Hamilton.
• Most Popular Book: (still) The Cowma Sutra—Discourses on Bovine Love.
• Thinnest Book: Hamilton Alive!—The Colour & Vibrancy of Hamilton.
• Thickest Book: God’s Own—The Religious Influence in Hamilton Councils.
• Most Popular Art Book—The Da Vinci Code.
• Quickest Read: The Influencers—Hamiltonians Who Have Made a Difference.
• Most Requested Book: Field of Dreams—A Photographic Essay of Sheep in Their Natural Habitat.
• Least Requested Book: Banking on it—John Banks and the Greater Auckland.
• Most Acclaimed Reference Book: A Higher Standard--Aerial Top-Dressing in the Waikato.
• Most Popular Autobiography: (Equal First) Hard to Swallow by Bill Clinton and First Love—Only a Cattleman Understands by George W. Bush (as told to Bess T. Ality).
• Most Repeatedly Taken Out: The Compulsive Obsessive—A Manual.
• Most Acclaimed Sports Book: Knot in This Life—How to Tie Good Knots.
• How To Drive Books: (Tie) The New Zealand Road Code and Dukes of Hazard—The Early Years.
• Religious Doctrines: (Tie) The Bible and Straight Furrow.
• Most Popular DVD(s): None—no demand.
• Most Popular VHS Videos: Country Calendar.
• Most Popular Computer Book: About Your Amstrad.
• Most Popular in Library: (By Public Survey, and still!) Calendar Girls—Taking Stock, The Best of Country Calendar.

A Life in the Shadows

  I like to live in the shadows; I never like to be the centre of attention. If there’s a spotlight, I’m the one checking where the nearest ...