I don't loke it

One of the guiding principles of my life is to minimise my use of the word whatever. Whatever in the young lexicon is to imply tacit rather than wholesale acceptance and intent to move on. As I am no longer young and have no respect for the young their use of whatever in that context will not knowingly be replicated by me. Nor will their profligate use of the extremely versatile but somewhat soft word “like”—as in seemingly every second word uttered by a young woman being like. Interesting point that, I never hear it used by boys. Have you noticed that? Have you also noticed that it always appears in the middle of a sentence, sometimes several times, but never at the end? A young woman told me once that the reason for that was compliance with an unwritten rule now in customary use. Strange, considering the very use of that word in this context defies all rules and logic that I know of. But whilst the use of like is strange the word itself is not. A strange word is loke. There is a word, the wonderful Urban Dictionary designates and defines it. Loke means deep affection towards your significant other, which is stronger than like, yet not as strong as love. I am told that you can even buy mugs, T-shirts and cards proclaiming your loke for someone or something. I am not tempted. It is yet another travesty of English. I say to you emphatically, it is with “whatever intent” that I will either like (most) everyone or love some. I refuse to loke anyone. Loke it or leave it.