Friday, December 6, 2019

Questions people ask

One of my most prized office possessions is my office chair. It is a bit old and frayed now, but it still fits my bum like Michel Jackson’s glove. Sadly of late, the chair has begun to show its age in a less visual manner; the hydraulic raising and lowering mechanism has literally run out of breath. The result is that the chair, like a local council I once worked for, is continually sinking to new depths, taking me with it.
I initially contemplated buying a new chair, but then I decided to google the problem and see if there was a quick and cheaper solution. There was. The solution, involving a hose clamp costing $2.35, works perfectly and the chair has a few years more in it yet.
I am not surprised that I could google a solution. You can find almost anything on Google these days. I remember a Fryday I wrote on how to use toilet seats. When, as part of the research for that article I posed the question on Google, I got  7,690,000 responses.
So that got me thinking; what are some of the most useless questions people ask of Google? I am not the first to ask. Here is what Mobiles.co.uk found when they asked the same question:
1. Do cockerels crow when they feel like it?
2. How many toes does a rhinoceros have?
3. Why is your face on your head?
4. Why does cucumber taste like shampoo?
5. What is the average weight of a panda?
6. What is the length of spaghetti?
7. How can I grow taller?
8. Does the Mandela Effect confirm the existence of a parallel universe?
9. Can helicopters fly upside down?
10. What is the lifespan of a mayfly?
11. How do I get my husband a brain transplant?
12. Who let the dogs out?
13. What percentage of people have seen a ghost?
14. What is the funniest joke in the world?
15. How does a giraffe clean its ears?
16. What happens to old false legs?
17. Where can I find gold?
18. Why don’t ducks feet stick to ice?
19. How can I make a time machine?
And my favourite…
20: Google, where are my keys?


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