Let's sex this up

With a few minutes to spare this week, my thoughts turned to sex. Strange word: sex. It can be a verb, as in having it; a noun in terms of the act; and again, a verb as in determining the gender and even an instruction (not in the 50 Shades of Grey context) of “sexing” something up.
Two articles in today’s NZ Herald, a publication I rarely find interesting, prompted my new-found, though brief, interest in sex.

One was an article listing New Zealand’s top five dating sites. Yes, I know dating doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with sex—but let’s not be pedantic, and you have my sympathies that it didn’t work out for you. However, I digress.

What interested me about this article was that the second most popular dating site is called Academic Singles, which promises to “put you in touch with intelligent people near you.” Well I guess that could work; anywhere except Hamilton.

But what would a date with an intelligent person be like?  What would happen? Would the main subject under discussion be philosophy, the classics, or poetry? Would the sexual component consist entirely of an academic critique on Masters & Johnson? Who knows? In any case, the questions themselves are—well—academic. Surely, intelligence is indefinable—even adjustable. In the context of this site, it is also a conceit. I applaud anyone for going on to the site to find someone intelligent—we are all lonely at times—but are they not making a rather large assumption that they, themselves, are intelligent? I am not sure I would like to go out with someone so arrogant. However, good luck.

The second NZ Herald article about sex was a Kinsey Institute study of the amount of sex we should be having according to our age. Well, of course we would want to go and read that, wouldn’t we? I was not surprised to learn from the Kinsey study that those aged 18 to 29 had “sex” on average 112 times a year. Between the ages of 30 and 39, it drops to 86 times annually.  And sexual activity droops (pun intended) for 40 to 49-year-olds to half the amount of sex of their 20-something counterparts, making love 69 times a year on average…and some of it, I guess, must be distinctly average.

However, what disappointed me was that there was no mention in the study of the quantity (or quality) of sex for those aged over 50. The Herald tells us that is because (the study) “appears to back up separate research which found that sexuality among older people is largely ignored.” Really? Which separate research was that, and who did they ask?

To be honest, and here I am being both honest and through Fryday anonymous, I find it easier to ignore the Herald than sex. I am also here interested in their use of the word “sexuality.” One definition of that word I read said it was the study of human sexuality, which should certainly appeal to Academic Singles. Another dictionary defined sexuality as “a person’s sexual orientation or preference.” In stating that we over 50s are ignoring that, is the Herald suggesting we don’t care? That we’ll have it off—so to speak—with anyone? Well, all I can say to “Granny Herald” is that we over 50s are (usually) more selective in our partners than you are in your use of terminology.