Taking the Sub Way

Fifty Shades of Grey and its two sequels are publishing phenomena, second only in modern times to the Harry Potter series. E.L. James’ trilogy has topped the best-seller lists in the U.K., the U.S.A., Australia and here in New Zealand. It’s sold 20 million copies worldwide and has in fact surpassed the Harry Potter series for paperback sales. All because of the subject matter, and a shared susceptibility to immerse ourselves—safely—in a world foreign to most of us. If you haven’t read them, the premise of the books, at least the first of them, is the attempt by a young but filthy rich businessman to turn a young but beautiful virgin (at 22, pleeeeassse!) into his submissive (sub). Problem is—and, sorry to say, Fryday is going to act as a spoiler here—that world exists, but not in the manner portrayed in these books. The world of heavily regimented and governed bondage and discipline portrayed in Fifty Shades of Grey smacks (intended) more of the fantasy of a slightly over-weight, middle-aged woman using Google and a trawl through on-line sex shops for her research rather than personal experience. E.L. James is indeed slightly overweight and middle-aged. No problem there. Except perhaps that is why—along with the lack of valid research— these books are so badly written. There is no synergy, no empathy between her and her main characters: the young, vivacious beautiful, gorgeous Christian Grey, and the only slightly less so Anastasia Steele. I’ll give you just one of many examples: in Ms James’ less than deft hands, Anastasia is “beguiled” by Christian and he by her. Beguiled? When did you last hear that word used, particularly by a 22 year-old? The books are littered with such archaic terms, and whilst the email threads that form such a large part of the books are moderately amusing the overall impression is that whatever world E.L. James is coming from she has never been there and thus she becomes an unreliable and tortuous guide. These are just bad books, and not in a good way. Anyone wanting to experience the real thing, even vicariously, should avoid them. There are better books on the subject elsewhere. And there is always Hamilton.