Friday, February 22, 2008

On The Nose

I’m sorry, I’m a bit tired. This morning’s daily dalliance in bed was shattered by a sudden and strident knocking at my back door. I knew who it was, of course: Whetu has a habit of worming himself around to my backdoor—more used to it, I guess. Nevertheless, I left Maggie to her dreams of Brendon McCullum (God, he’s gorgeous!) and last night’s waiter (If I were only 18 again!) and stumbled to the door, still in surprise.

ME: Whetu?

HE: Tena Koutu, Tena Koutu, Take a photo.

ME: What?

HE: Kia ora Bro. Want a photo?

ME: What are you on about Whetu? What are you trying to sell me this time?

HE: Take your photo.

ME: Why?

HE: Make you famous.

ME: Don’t want to be famous.

HE: Made me famous.

ME: Oh?

HE: Yeah, I gets my photo in the paper lots. Sometimes they does the front on photo like this, eh. Sometimes they does the side-on one like this, eh. Sometimes both.

ME: I don’t want my photo taken thanks.

HE: Made Keith Locke famous.

ME: What?

HE: Made Keith Locke famous when he gots his photo taken with Tama Iti.

ME: That was John Key.

HE: Not Tama Iti?

ME: No, Not Keith Locke.

HE: With Tama Iti?

ME: Yes.

HE: Not Keith Locke?

ME: Yes. No. John Key.

HE: Close.

ME: Yes.

HE: Anyways, you gets your photo taken with me; make youse famous.

ME: How did you find me, Whetu?

HE: Only $20.00. Got a camera?

ME: No thanks.

HE: Worth trying though, eh?

ME: Yep.

HE: I’ll be back.

ME: Like my herpes.

HE; I know him. He that Geek god fella.

ME: I guess. Bye, Whetu.

HE: HE’S famous!

ME: Bye Whetu.

HE: I seen HIS photo.

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Now playing: The Band - To Kingdom Come
via FoxyTunes

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